Barbara Crampton is reliably bloody and funny as a preacher’s wife whose dreary life is upended by a vampire’s kiss
Scream queen Barbara Crampton, the always-welcome star of many a smart if schlocky horror movie (see Chopping Mall, You’re Next, assorted Puppet Master flicks) is in her element here playing Anne, the mostly neglected and ignored spouse of suburban minister Jakob (Larry Fessenden). Years back, Anne had ambitions to travel and find adventure, but instead of marrying handsome classmate Tom (Robert Rusler), she settled for kindly if ditchwater-dull Jakob, and a lifetime of sitting in pews listening to his dreary sermons and talking to parishioners.
An assignation with old flame Tom, in town to buy a disused mill, and a stolen kiss seem like the prelude to a Mills & Boon-style tale of middle-age adultery and lust. Thankfully we’re not going in that direction; instead, this turns into a blood-splattered vampire movie when Anne is bitten but not killed by a mysterious bloodsucker known as the Master (Bonnie Aarons from The Conjuring/The Nun franchise). Soon she’s wearing clever little chokers to hid her puncture marks, lipstick the colour of haemoglobin, and insisting Jakob take her out to dinner, service her reawakened libido, and generally treat her with more respect.